


what are you? gay?

by postfixrevolution



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Crack Treated Seriously, M/M, Making Out, Mild Language, Mild Sexual Content, Post-Timeskip (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), i know i tagged ashe but he doesn't do much besides accidentally become a voyeur sorry, pls do not take this fic too seriously, this is based off my favourite fucking sylvix meme and it should be ur fave too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-11
Updated: 2019-09-11
Packaged: 2020-10-13 23:07:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20590634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/postfixrevolution/pseuds/postfixrevolution
Summary: "Can you people stop being gay?" Sylvain retorts, shooting Felix an exaggeratedly offended glare. It's admittedly satisfying to see his pretty hazel eyes twitch. "Studyingtogether? We're in a public space. Cut it out."Felix's response is immediate, and just as venomously curt as he was expecting. "Fuck you," he deadpans.





	what are you? gay?

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this at 3am because i haven't been able to stop thinking about [this tweet](https://twitter.com/0vv0b/status/1162804384087961600?s=20) and it is....a hot, unbeta-ed mess. enjoy?

Sylvain leans back in his chair, balancing the piece of furniture precariously on its back legs. If he cranes his neck back far enough, he can just barely see the tops of Felix's and Ashe's heads at the table behind him. It's a terribly uncomfortable angle to be observing his friends at, but the library is nearly empty and he finds himself quite bored. Reviewing the professor's latest battle plans for the third time over just isn't enough to retain his attention. 

He contemplates leaving to go find Ingrid, wondering if he might be able to wheedle an exasperated yet undeniably fond agreement to tea and cakes from the girl, but she had left with Dorothea's and the professor's names on her lips. Loathe as he is to admit it, Sylvain isn't quite sure luck would be on his side if those two were present when he tried to find Ingrid. 

Sighing, Sylvain resorts to watching Felix and Ashe study next month's battle plans in relative silence. Felix sits as impassive as always, moving only when Ashe leans over and points at a particular diagram in their notes, asking the swordsman for his thoughts. It's nice to see that Felix, to his credit, only exhales a single, quiet scoff through his nose before acquiescing, muttering explanations to the archer with something fractionally less annoyed than a frown. There's a difference in the microexpression, really, and Sylvain finds it quite nice to see Felix becoming less of an ass as time goes on.

As if acutely attuned to his inner musings, Felix chooses that exact moment to look up, narrowing sharp hazel eyes at Sylvain. He doesn't even bother to ask what the other man is doing.

"Spit it out or shut up."

"I wasn't even _ saying _ anything!" Sylvain protests. "Can't a guy just watch his good friends study without getting harangued?"

"No," Felix answers immediately. "Do you actually have a problem, Sylvain, or can we _ all _ get back to reading?"

Sylvain bites back the urge to tell him that he's already finished reading the professor's plans—twice, no less—and traces the irritated crease of Felix's brow instead, noting that upside down is a terrible angle for him and Ashe both. The terse silence stretches as Felix waits for Sylvain to reply, and he decides right then and there that messing with Felix is the _ only _reasonable cure for his boredom. 

"As a matter of fact, I _ do _ have a problem!" he chirps pleasantly. Felix raises an unimpressed eyebrow at him, arms crossed.

"Can you people stop being gay?" Sylvain retorts, shooting Felix an exaggeratedly offended glare. It's admittedly satisfying to see his pretty hazel eyes twitch. "_Studying _together? We're in a public space. Cut it out."

Felix's response is immediate, and just as venomously curt as he was expecting. "Fuck you," he deadpans. Beside him, Ashe looks absolutely bewildered. "And kindly shut up, Sylvain. Unlike you, some of us have better things to do than ignore the very plans that intend to keep us alive next battle."

Sylvain ignores his accusation completely, sitting up and turning his chair around to face them with an amused smirk. 

"Looks like you're in a terrible mood, as always," he snorts, arching an eyebrow at the swordsman. "What are you?" Sylvain tacks on, lips curling up to add teeth to his smirk, honey colored eyes alight with challenge. Felix visibly darkens at the display. "Gay?"

His chair screeches painfully as Felix bolts up, an absolutely murderous expression in his eyes as he slams a palm against the tabletop. Ashe winces—at the sound or at Felix's terrifying expression, Sylvain can't quite tell—but the hand he raises in an attempt to placatingly rest atop Felix's shoulder is roughly thrown off.

Sylvain remains unaffected as ever as Felix stalks over, footsteps heavy and the furious set of his brows even heavier. It's quite amusing, if Sylvain is being honest, and entirely too fun to watch the way he holds his fists at his sides, fingers restlessly clenching and unfurling and lips pressed tight as he formulates a reply. Once he does, Felix mirrors Sylvain's stance, crossing his arms before himself.

"You fucking _ wish_," he hisses, scoffing derisively through his nose at the paladin. He unwinds one arm from around himself to jab a finger at Sylvain's chest, hazel eyes narrowing as he presses unnecessarily firmly against his ribcage. "You just wish you were me."

Felix leans slightly forward with a sneer, towering over the seated redhead for once, and Sylvain finds it a bit odd—if not somewhat intriguing—having to crane his neck up to look at him. The defiant tilt of his chin helps the shadows accentuate the sharp line of his jaw and the steep slant of his nose, and the jut of his downturned lips seems so much more obvious when viewed from below. It's a shame that Felix rarely had a height advantage over Sylvain.

"Oh yeah?" Sylvain repartees, only teeth and glinting eyes left in his wicked grin. He wraps a hand around Felix's wrist, fingers easily circling around entire circumference of it. When he squeezes his hand, fingers pressing into the taut flesh of Felix's arm, he swears he can almost hear the swordsman suck in a sharp breath. The finger previously jammed against his chest twitches away. "Oh _ yeah_?"

Honey colored eyes fixate on the first thing that moves: Felix's throat visibly bobs as he swallows thickly before responding, and Sylvain would be lying if he said he didn't trace the length of it before turning his gaze back upward. There is a scowl on Felix's lips, unsurprisingly, but the glare he levels at Sylvain doesn't quite meet his eyes. It's pointed somewhere lower, somewhere that barely causes each subsequent breath from the swordsman's mouth to shake, breathy and unsure. 

It sends a jolt down Sylvain's spine to realize that Felix is staring at his mouth.

"_Yeah _," Felix echoes distractedly, the hand hovering over his chest splaying out to press his palm flat against him. "You fucking stubborn asshole." His fingers curl, just barely enough to hook into the open collar of Sylvain's vest, but the electric brush of Felix's fingertips against his neck is all he needs. 

Sylvain yanks Felix forward by the front of his tunic and meets him halfway with an opened mouth kiss, licking hungrily at the seam of his lips. The growl that hums in the back of Felix's throat is loud enough for the sound to vibrate between them, adding to the heady buzz that already spreads across Sylvain's lips like fire. 

Felix kisses him back like he does all things: aggressively and with his teeth bared. The hand at his collar finally decides to find purchase there, bunching up the fabric and using it to drag the paladin even closer. When Sylvain licks at his lips again, trying to coax the other man's mouth open, Felix growls lowly against him and pushes back, forcing his tongue away and sinking teeth into Sylvain's bottom lip. The pain is extremely short lived, but the jolt it arc down his spine sinks immediately to his groin. He shifts his hands down to find Felix's hips, pulling him forward into his lap, and the madman actually _ lets _ him, straddling Sylvain against the library chair. 

His hands wander to Felix's thighs, fingers burrowing beneath the cuff of his boots and digging hard into the muscle there, hard enough to make Felix gasp desperately against his lips. It's a terrible sound, one that absolutely refuses to help Sylvain's growing erection, and the swordsman's restless shifting atop him only makes it worse. When the inside of Felix's thigh brushes against his dick, Sylvain jolts, rearing back with a groan half caught in his throat.

Felix follows him with his eyes still pressed shut, leaning their foreheads together. "You're _ insatiable _ ," he mutters, breath hot against Sylvain's burning skin, sending the nerve endings there into dizzying overdrive. Honey colored eyes flutter hazily open, half lidded as they gaze up at the man in his lap and his flushed cheeks, lips parted and panting and swollen from teeth—_Sylvain's _ teeth—greedily tugging and nipping at them.

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Sylvain hums back, leaning in to kiss him again. It's slower this time, but he still presses forward with a hungry insistence, sliding his tongue past Felix's lips and into his mouth. His teeth graze over Sylvain's tongue with just enough pressure to draw a low shudder from him, fingers still tense against the other man's thighs. Felix leans back enough to separate them, chest heaving.

"I never said it was," he corrects him, and Sylvain can feel the slight smile on his lips as Felix drags them across his jaw, leaving a line of open-mouth kisses as he goes. When he reaches the area just below his ear, Felix drags himself closer to better reach it. The motion presses Sylvain's erection hard against Felix's thigh, forcing a moan past his lips that startles all three of them. 

It takes a second for Sylvain to remember that there are _ three _ of them in total to startle.

_ Fuck_, they forgot about Ashe.

Sylvain forces himself to pull away at the realization, cloudy eyes fluttering open to meet the archer's bewildered gaze. Ashe, still seated at the table across from them, regards them with a mortified flush on his cheeks. Upon making eye contact with Sylvain, he blinks at the scene before him, as if he was almost entirely certain this was just a lucid and _ extremely _fucking stupid dream. 

"_Huh? _" he blurts incredulously.

Out of breath as he is, Felix still manages to huff in annoyance against the side of Sylvain's jaw, fingers digging impatiently into his waist as Sylvain tilts his lips away, if only to address Ashe.

"I'm sorry," he offers breathlessly, "Did you need something, you homophobe?"

Felix is evidently not amused with the teasing quip, scoffing under his breath as he yanks Sylvain's collar low and bites unabashedly at the front of his neck. The action is unexpected and immediately smoothed over by lips and the hot swipe of his tongue against the smarting flesh, forcing a choked groan from Sylvain's throat. Ashe flushes an even darker red at that, panickedly muttering something about needing to leave before sprinting out. He doesn't even remember to take his notebooks with him. 

The library door slams shut with a lingering echo once he leaves, and in the ensuing silence, Sylvain becomes acutely aware of how loudly his blood is rushing behind his eardrums, how heavy and desperate his pants for air ring out between them. Felix pulls away from his neck with obscenely wet smack, the glide of his breath against the sensitive skin making Sylvain shiver. 

"That was _ the _ most tactless way you could have asked Ashe to leave," Felix reprimands him. It would sound exasperated if not for gentle press of his nose against against the other's jaw as he speaks, nuzzled so close into Sylvain's shoulder that Felix's every breath ghosts across his neck. His hand still remains perched at the older man's waist, fingers curling possessively into the fabric of his vest. 

"It worked, didn't it?" Sylvain repartees, lifting his head enough to grin brightly down at him. Felix scoffs, rolling his eyes. "Admit it, Felix, you love my sense of humor."

"I _ admit _ that you're far more tolerable when you're not talking," he bites back, gaze turned pointedly away from Sylvain's own. 

"That can be remedied," Sylvain chuckles, lifting Felix's head to be level with his own. They make eye contact only briefly before Felix glances away, gaze fluttering restlessly down the slant of Sylvain's nose, tracing the bow of his lips. Sylvain doesn't look away from Felix's eyes as he does, watching them droop hazily with desire the longer he stares. "Are you going to kiss me again?" he asks lowly, fingers sliding over from his chin to the back of his neck, idly twirling the loose strands of his hair. Felix licks his lips absently.

"Only if it will get you to finally shut up," he murmurs, not an ounce of venom in the quiet, breathy sound of it.

"Oh," Sylvain smirks, "it _ absolutely _ w—"

Felix buries his fingers into the other man's hair before he can finish, wrenching him forward. His teeth and tongue wasting no time in diving hungrily at Sylvain's lips. It absolutely _ does _ shut him up.

**Author's Note:**

> come talk to me about sylvix on twitter [@panntherism](https://twitter.com/panntherism), i swear i'm capable of more than shitty memes


End file.
